Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Don't Tell Anyone I Told You

I may have mentioned a time or two this guy that I'm married to. He's (as it's been described) a "handful".

He's mysterious and strange and funny and brilliant and as handsome as they come. I think he made a deal with someone because the man is seriously getting sexier by the second.

He's away from us; traveling for work. We've been married for 14 years and in that time we've spent a lot of time apart and I can say with an honest and open heart that I can't remember ever actually *missing* him. I don't mind having the bed, kids, food, wine, bills, garbage, cats, pool, diapers all to myself. He always comes home and he's always out there getting paid.

There may also be a malfunction or two in my coping network wherein I don't *allow* myself to miss people. Regardless, it don't happen. Sue me.

Right. That's how it goes. Until late Monday, that is.

I cried myself sick from Sunday morning through Monday night. I cried all the way to work, I cried getting my hair dyed. I cried cooking dinner, I cried folding laundry. I cried changing Lincoln's clothes, I cried cleaning the downstairs bathroom. It was relentless. And so was this other thing that kept tugging at my hem... this missing thing.

Of course I didn't recognize it at first and I kept trying to flick it away like a bug. But the bastard hung in and hung on and crawled up my back and over the nape of my neck to my ear, settled into my ear and whispered: It's ok. You can have that feeling. There's nothing wrong with you. Go ahead, go miss your husband.

So, yeah. That handful? I'll take two. And a mouthful (just for fun).

No comments: