Niagra Falls (on its face) Part I

Ooof. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...

Having children is hard; traveling with them is maniacal. Traveling with children who have emotional & sensory needs above and beyond the norm is SUICIDAL.

As if the 7 hour car ride wasn't enough of a deterrent. Whatever. We put three kids in a minivan at 2PM (naps be damned!) and hit the muthahumpin road to Ontario, bitches.

Penelope was predictable: Like an adorably quirky OCD cuckoo-clock, she asked every 20 minutes WHEN WILL WE BE THERE!?!?!?!

Ruby ate al the snacks I had procured in 17.9 minutes (a personal best).

I'm still processing the pit-stop for dinner at an Arby's somewhere near Binghamton.

And Link, sweet Link. My man held it together till hour 6. Then the wheels came off. And he burst into flames. And he ate our brains.

Going across the border was fun. The guard asked my husband if he was being punished and told me he'd sanction giving the children alcohol if we felt it was necessary.

Poor Link was out of his mind by the time we got to the hotel. Mercifully, he was asleep within minutes, the Hot Husband found mama a bottle of wine, himself a bottle of bourbon and the girls dialed Nickelodeon in on the TV.

We made it.